Posted: February 18, 2011 in Uncategorized

So whats up I am back now and boy boy what news I have for you.

Well after all the talk of me going to work for a special forces unit in Nahal, I ended up there for two weeks. since the last time I updated.

there was a huge fire in Israel, were I ended up going after my unit got mobilized. this is something I realy dont want to go into detail about on a public place, it was very horrible.

and in December I ended up in my first Training excersise. and trust the IDF to do this in the middle off winter and in a fucking storm on top of a mountain.

So the night before the new officer calls me into her offce to tell me to issue out a weapon, and wet weather gear from the logestics team as we are going to the training excersie. I couldnt belive my luck finaly I was going to see some cool shit. this cute officer even told me “Arik there will be tanks and I will show you my old tank unit”. being the typical forigner soldier I was giddy abasloutly boyish with excitment.

So I went and issued my gear out, and oh my god I never put it on I refused, I dont know what the fuck was up with it, helemt and vest fine, wet weather gera on fucking way, I told the guy  vova there is no way I am wearing this it spells like vomit, I issued it out anyway and left it in the jeep the whole time.

I got my weapon from him aswell and reported back to the officer, ready to go,  I couldnt wait for it I didnt sleep all night, I reported 3pm next day and off we went in a car with the officer chick (who I could not take my eyes off) a cornal in the reserve army and two other reserve soldiers. an hour driving and the weather was shit it was cold deathly cold rain, we stoped at the Israeli version of burger king and typical fassion I head to the book store get a book called son of hamas (decent book by the way recomended) and we go and all eat at burgerranch, as we eat a squad of  blue beret united nations peacekeepeing fucks walked in (im not a big fan) stearing at us, m-16 short slung across my back.

So we finish eating and being a novilty in the army as  I speak english every reserve soldier was talking with me and were realy nice (if you want to impress a girl seriously be star of the crowd)

another 3 hours we arrive at the location, up the side of the hill this is were my officer decideds for unknowed reasons to take my gun for herself, the weather got worse, it was one of those nights and one of the bigist storms of winter in recent Israeli history, and here I am freazing my ass off in a tent on the side of a hill.. now the mud was horrible hundrads of feet and cars had turned it into a bog. I saw people slip and slid all night,

I helped the officer chick (I am pourbosly not using her name) carry a box to the tent in the middle of the fucking storm, expecting it to contain something cool like ammo or granades even a computer that could lanuch missiles, so I asked “what is all this anyway”? as we stuck the box on the ground she opend it and it was all fucking pens and rulers etc. sarcasticly I look up at her and said “oh yeah well they allways said the pen is mighter than the sword” she laughs and goes on to explain to me that this is thee comand center, I lokked around and she was right there were phones and maps high ranking officers, and a cool satilite map that could show all the jeeps hummers trucks apc’s tanks and foot soldier positions and when anyone got into trouble it would flash red a aalarm would sound and tell you were the unit was exactly. I was impressed. I sat down with nothing to do the rain still proing outside and the wind threatning to blow us off the hill at any moment. I was so so cold my hands were blue. I pulled out my book and cookies and coke (yep I brought that to the feild sue me) and sate down and red the book,  “this looks intresting” the officer chick said siting next to me whats it about I explain to her in my moderate level of hebrew, and her moderate english what it’s about. “You have to sit down and explain to me about this book when your finished” she said and she continued to work on her map and computer.  so I continued to read the book. and finished it at about 9pm, ” the officer chick was impressed keept compmenting me on my english skills  showing all the other officers how I finished this big english book in a matter of hours, so we get talking I found out she is 21 I was supprised a leutenent one rank away from captian at 21. she keept asking me about New Zealand and my life there,, I also found out her grand father was born in Indian on the way to Israel, she is not half indian like me but it was a little cool bit of information. and we get to playing hand games, or as I call it slaps, were one person keeps hiting your hands untill you movie it and they miss if you flinch before they hit you they get a free hit. so both off us tired and cold and wet started playing this game all the other officers came and watched, “I aint going to go easy on you just cause your a girl” I told her, and in perfect english she replies “Bring it” so I satrt crack my blue ice cold hand hits her equally ice cold hand. I play mind games to see if I can make her flinch, I go in for the next hit, streaing into her eyes, annnnnnnd I miss, fuck, the second incharge of the whole battalion laughs at me “come on Arik dont let her beat you come on” so she starts playing the mind tricks and the painfull hits follow, my hands swell no matter what I c did I couldnt win my turn, after about 15 hits and many laughs I could not go on, yes I was beaten by a girl.

now the night was very cold and violent winds. we go back to the jeep. I hop in the air conditoning is on hot, the wind rocks the car a the rain pounding the windows “what are we doing here I ask” sleeping of course”  the officer chick replied now I dont know but for me sleeping with two girls and another guy in a car, the guy and one of the girls your comanding officers, is very strange to me, coming from a british army system were officers are distant from there soldiers, but okk,

so the two girls take the back seats and me and the other guy my comander were in the front, air con on full, and I swerar I had a great nights sleep,  next morning we took the jeep to a gas station were I got coke chocolate gum chips and cookies. and brushed my teath, no shower that day,. we go back and after along 3 hours we all pack up and leave the area, after much pulling and hard work to get the veichales from the mud. than I saw it the army hires civilen buses at times to transport troops, turns out this guy had taken a wrong turn in the night and ended up stuck in the mud and I mean stuck, up to the weels and bumper. so the guy tells us the civilen company wants the equvilent of $3000 new zealand dollars to get it out, being mechanics andhaving armourd personal carriers we thought we would help me hooked the bus to the APC and pulled for an hour we tried, one final go and a sickning bang and crunch, “that cant be good” I said to one of the solders pissing myself laughing sure enough we had ripped the bumber off this guys bus I dont know whated happend after that or if he ever got his bus out as I was called away to beit shean with my officer. were we aint shwarmer.

in short I had a good time for the time I was there and there is even a part I can not tell you as it is very classified, but it does envolve a very special Israeli army unit. but I didnt get to see the tanks which sucked but I was more lucky than the kravi as they had to sleep in the rain. second night while I was returned to base as I had another job to do.

the officer chick is very very cute 21 years old bloody smart, and speaks ok english, but beacuse I am in another unit now I dont see her so much but we were laughing and talking the other say (for some reason she finds my jokes funny) the whole unit went bowling I sucked big time ate alot that night I worked so hard that day and was so hungry. and the week after we had pizza night at one of the girls houses with her mum and dad, were the guys fort it would be approprate to show her a video of me singing in hebrew and saying I am going to enter the Israeli verion of American Idol, and again was laughing at my story of when I was arrested in jordan and deportad to Israel.

Ilike her alot unfortunatly I aint the only guy I know of at least two others that like her, but dont say it to her, and one guy I aint sure if it’s male ego keeps saying she drops hints to him by asking if he has a girlfriend.  I dont say anythingas well those guys are Israeli and speak full hebrew, I am not and so dont think she would be intrested with a english speaking forigner.

january saw me move to the yamach, most of the soldiers there get to go home every day. I and my comander refused this  one as I live to far and for me there is no honner in it, but the Israelis say I am dumb and I should just go home everyday. it also saw me in hospital for the first itme in years (that will be a post in it’s self) and


I met with the sumchat the second in charge of nahal, and told him I want to move, he promised if I get my health profile to 72 he will send me to tanks. but I think I will stay in the ordance corps as a mechanic, same benifeits as kravi less shit good skill, also in war I go with the kravi to the lines and have the possiblity of seeing and being in combat. but in peace I do a job, and am home every weekend, so why change a good thing? nd my comander is great. so yeah anyway ya’ll im off to bed as it’s 0230 and I need sleep and maybe food anyway.

Shabat shalom


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